I love when I wake up [entries|friends|calendar] capt. han [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

"The holy grail is still full. No waterfalls!! [October 10th, 2009] I think I am dangerously close to falling in love with Marlboro. And dancing on the edge of realizing how much of an awful person Ross truly can be. That, my friends, is the question holding down my hopes of applying. 5 comments|post comment

You know I was thinking- it wasn't okay for you to do that to my car. [December 1st, 2008] this motherfucker is only for my friends to read. look@ how fucking tiny her legs are. I think this time last year, I was @a low. And now, I don't know where I am. I'm so, so indifferent about college, but I guess the hard part of applying is done. I'm sure I'll get all anxious and scared again once acceptances roll around- that's when I really have to make the decision. I am so excited for Christmas. I honestly do not want a thing. Just a really nice evening with Brooke and some snow. But I cannot wait to go to my second home and give everyone their gifts. I just like seeing peoples' reactions to knowing that I care. I'm trying so much to get better at everything, but I don't know how that's going yet. I bought a new journal today and it's huge. It'll take a year for me to finish, if I'm lucky. I really, really want to rearrange and redo my room again.. already. 2 comments|post comment

generalize my disease, I need a taste of what it's like. [September 9th, 2008] [ music | s@ge fr4nc1s! ] My horoscope was talking about trash talkers and problems that won't go away. Sometimes I love how they're so dead on. My life has been one huge hill after the next, and I'm pretty sure it's never going to stop. But I am so beyond okay with that. From this past weekend, I've made so many bonds stronger and got in touch with old pasts. I'm not saying it was worth it, but it showed me what and who really matter. Not to mention, good ole' MarbReds got my heart back. In art, I had a painting of the cutest seven year old boy I've ever seen trying not to smile, with face paint like a cat. I went to the freshman art room and broke the canvas into a million pieces. It's sitting out in the rain in Taunton somewhere. Sometimes a little rain and a day off is all you need. I have always been completely horrible at forever goodbyes, and you know what? I think that was my problem the whole time. The funniest part was, my biggest mistake was just a two minute down the street beach. Never had I ever kissed someone while crying. listen to Hold On by Tim Armstrong. ( I love Camel Crush. )

[September 3rd, 2008] (6:50) wake up! (7:20) leave4school. (7:48) school starts. (2:30) ccxc hXc starts. (4:30) xc ends. (4:30) time for work. (8:30) home! homework, shower, and prepping for tomorrow ensue. I keep having dreams about eating meat, and waking up and not knowing if they're real or not. I don't know what this means. ("To dream that you are eating meat, signifies that you are getting to the heart of the matter."). I still don't know what this means. I hungout with Tom Jones for the first time in three years on Monday. I liked getting lost at Profile Rock, getting spun on merry-go-rounds by a drunk black man, and making a mess @Cumby's. I think I'll especially like drinking with him this weekend. I have school tomorrow and my first XC meet. I like being a senior, I like having electives, I love my XC team and school friends. But I hate having no time and a lack of energy. Pretty soon I'll run out. I want Elemeno and my assuredness back.

[October 25th, 2005] okay. halloween in six days. why am i not looking forward to it? homecoming in two weeks. another thing i'm not looking forward to. he ruins everything. i think? post comment

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